How to deal with Doom and Gloom

How to deal with Doom and Gloom

It’s grey and pouring with rain as I sit to write this blog post……..

A rainy window with blurred lights behind

The news is awful, finances are difficult, anxiety is high, and the weather is dreary.

The perfect set of ingredients to make you believe your business is bound to suffer.  Surely, no one is willing to spend on frivolous items in the current climate? 

In these trying times, here are some tips on how to deal with doom and gloom:

Mindset matters

Tell yourself over and over how bad things are, how worried you are and your mindset will suffer.  You will become negative and believe that the worst is about to happen.  How are you going to build the strength and resilience to keep going, keep up your energy and keep focusing on your goals with such a mindset? 

Whatever it takes to stop the negative chatter, do that.  Whether that is escaping the work environment for a bit, taking some me-time, a walk in nature, playing with the dog, seeking out positive friends and acquaintances – make time to improve your mindset.

Positivity breeds positivity – it’s hard at times, but become a beacon in these dark times and you will reap rewards from those that are seeking some relief from the doom and gloom.

Stop listening to the news

How would a good news station fair in this world?  Wouldn’t it be wonderful to tune in and listen to heart-warming, uplifting and motivating news.  Since that doesn’t seem to exist, except in the odd  podcast, you may wish to stop listening to the news. 

For 10 years we didn’t have a TV as our kids were growing up.  News was always delivered via radio and I’ve never gone back to TV news since.  The radio news is not more positive at the moment sadly, but it does seem less sensational, without all the visual images that are so disturbing.  If you are finding it difficult at the moment, a sabbatical from the news could be a good place to start.

People need cheering up more than ever

There is no doubt about it, many people will not be spending on extras at the moment as the cost-of-living crisis is very real.  Some will still want to buy a treat, even if they treat themselves less often.  There are still birthdays and special occasions, Christmas do’s etc.  Providing something fun and distracting for your clients right now is just what they need.  You are not just providing an experience or product, you are providing as escape, some fun, some therapy, a distraction. 

Two people making chocolates

If what you provide will make people feel better, be proud to shout about this as it’s just what’s needed right now.

Deliver the best experience possible

This is my mantra.  When I train people on how to run their own workshops where they live, I can’t express enough the need to go above and beyond people’s expectations and deliver something to the absolute best of your ability.  Focusing on the customer journey, their experience with you from the moment they interact with you to the moment that’s over.  Your attitude, your willingness, your gratefulness and your understanding are key to making good relationships with your clients.

A small business owner has a unique opportunity to stand out at the moment and really make a difference.  If a client is buying fewer things, then those things that they do decide to buy really matter.  It’s not just a case of that will do, they want the absolute best for their money.

Don’t stop doing the important things

If you believe that people are not able to pay for what you have, and you stop talking to your clients then your business will suffer.  Marketing matters, in difficult times more than ever.  Keep in touch.  You may receive more no’s than usual, don’t take it to heart, but understand that it’s a ‘not right now’ for some clients.  They know you are still going and trying hard to make it work.  They may recommend you to a friend, or when times are better, be looking forward to using your services or buying your product again.

How can you ride the storm?

Think about ways to ride the storm, could that be an additional part-time job to help with cash-flow for example? 

It feels like a lot of energy after the pandemic to find even more creative ways to keep afloat.  It may be time to say goodbye, but remember to focus on your reasons for starting the business, and why you became your own boss in the first instance.  If that is still as strong as ever, it’s time to get creative to save your business baby and work on a strategy to ride the storm and emerge stronger and better than before.

Be Kind

Be kind to yourself and those in the world around you.  People are stressed and worried and we never know their whole story.  Small acts of kindness go a long way.  Here’s a lovely article from The Guardian from a recent Kindness Study.  The conclusion encourages all of us to do more – it will make you feel better as well as the recipient.

Foodie Hacks to help the Budget

Foodie Hacks to help the Budget

I’m very lucky to be able to grow things in my garden, have a car to drive to discount stores as well as access to a nice kitchen and oven to cook things in. At the time of writing, I’m also still able to pay my energy bills!  

For many, it’s so much harder than that.  

I still hope it might prove helpful to share some of my foodie hacks that help the budget go just a little bit further.

Cook from scratch

I try and do this as much as I can and have ditched ready-made food items where possible. We rarely have takeaways these days and try and save eating out and/or takeaways for special occasions.

It always takes more time and effort to cook from scratch, so you will need to factor this into your meal plans.

There were some cheats I used to buy, such as bean burgers, as they were relatively inexpensive. I now make these myself too, and it’s much cheaper (and hopefully healthier also) to do so.

Bean Burgers

Bean burger in a seeded bun on a plate on the table

Take a can of mixed beans, drain, rinse and throw these in your mixer (or use a hand-blender or masher), add whatever you like to zing up the mixture. I add things like tomato puree, chilli, lemon, herbs, garlic, onion, spices such as cumin, coriander, and fennel; and blend/mash together. I sometimes blend with an egg, but often just add a little oil and breadcrumbs (see below).

One can usually make three large or four medium bean burgers. Form into a patty shape and chill for at least a couple of hours in the fridge.

Breadcrumbs

If I don’t have any stale bread, I will leave a slice or two of bread out to go stale. A quick whizz-up and hey-presto they are done. If I make too many, I pop the rest in the freezer.

Plan ahead – if you need breadcrumbs for a recipe you need to factor in time to make them.

Pesto

Jar of basil pesto

We love a bit of pesto in our house and always make our own. We use cheaper ingredients but still get great results.

The oil – we use a mixture, usually rapeseed with a little olive oil (keeping the more expensive oil to a minimum).

Use salted peanuts instead of pine nuts. They work well and are much cheaper to buy. You need to keep an eye on the salt content and adjust to taste as you are adding salt with the nuts.

Instead of Parmesan, we buy Grana Padano.

Lentils

Lentils are such a tasty, versatile, and well-priced ingredient, I’ve already written a blog on them.

Leftovers

To be honest, they are rarely much in the way of leftovers in my house, but when there are, I will always try and get creative and turn them into something else or use them as part of another meal.

What do you do with yours? 

Please come and share your top tips with the rest of us.

Store Cupboard supper

In the past, I’ve often thought I don’t have anything in for a meal and will pop to the shops to top up. 

Now I try and avoid that until the next bigger shop and make something from what’s in the store cupboard.

It might be something really simple such as potato or egg-based. I might whip up a sauce for pasta with a tin of tomatoes as a starting point. 

Create something stir-fried to go with rice, or rustle up a curry from what’s left in the veg compartment in the fridge, or use tins/packets of beans and pulses.

BBC Good Food is a great website to add in your main ingredient and see what recipe inspiration comes up.

Time to get creative with that store cupboard stock.  

Own Brand 

Some of the discount supermarkets own brand products I’ve found to be very good:

  • Tomato sauce
  • Marmite
  • Peanut butter (the good stuff that has no added palm oil)
  • Tonic water

These are much cheaper than the branded versions I’ve bought in the past, and in our opinion, taste just as good.

Would you have anything to add to this list? Please share.

Eat more veg

As a family, we try and eat veggie meals around 75% of the time (100% for our veggie members of course!)

A pile of pumpklins

We spend more on the meat we do buy as we prefer to buy it from the farm shop, so we buy it less often.

Soup is often on the menu, sounds a bit sparing as a dinner, so I will often make it extra thick for an evening meal, maybe add coconut milk to make it more decadent then eat it with a lovely loaf.

It’s pumpkin time, don’t just carve them, why not make soups and curries and pies from your pumpkins!

I recently made a veggie stew with cheesy dumplings from the Good Food magazine for a big family gathering – rather than follow exactly the recipe, I used up all the veg I had in my fridge and bulked out with sweet potato and squash. Thankfully, it was a bit hit!

We have to mention Chocolate!

Supermarket own brands again are very good for chocolate for all tastes.

Look out for sales and short-dated stock – chocolate has a good long shelf-like and often if it’s near its sell-by date will still taste just as good!

Buy in bulk – if you trust yourself not to eat it all! Speak to me if you want to order some bulk chocolate and I can add yours to my order (and let you know the price).

Make your own desserts and treats.

Find out more

The Grocer magazine recently covered the best budget food bloggers and influencers to follow right now if you would like a more detailed and comprehensive guide on stretching your food budget.

Be a Blacksmith for the Day

Be a Blacksmith for the Day

My hubby, Jo Fry, runs beginner blacksmith courses at Standalone Farm in Letchworth Garden City.

Jo Fry (centre) with budding blacksmiths

He started the courses on the back of my chocolate workshop experiences. Previously all his work had been commissions, such as gates and railings. 

Someone asked him when he was going to start offering people the chance to come and play at the forge. Many years on, he now does courses only and this takes up all his time.

Here’s what he had to say about those that sign up to Be a Blacksmith for a Day.

It’s all in the Preparation

If you run events, you will know that so much of the hard work goes into the planning and preparation.

Before anyone arrives, I will do the necessary housekeeping (the forge gets quite grubby!), chop kindling, clean out the forge, and get all the equipment and materials ready.

Then it’s time for a sneaky coffee before lighting the forge, about 10 mins before my budding blacksmiths are due.

At the required time, I pop off to the car park to collect my guests.

The Briefing

As you can imagine, the health and safety element at the outset of the day is most important when you are teaching people how to use the forge, working on an open fire with hot metal.

I teach everyone this – the order of importance:

  1. Look after yourself
  2. Look after your materials
  3. Technique

The Generation Game

For those of a certain age, you will know what I mean. The demonstration by a seasoned pro makes everything look easy, and then you hand over and let each person have a go 😊

For each method or technique that we use I will demonstrate how it’s done, then encourage the participants to get going. I always try and leave each person to find their own way. Although I’ve been a blacksmith since leaving school (a rather long time ago), I show them the way I would do things and say they are welcome to follow me or experiment a little if they want to.

Patience is really important, and rather than butt in I like to let people try and if necessary, fail, as that is the best way they are going to learn.

The Toasting Fork

Toasting fork handle in the forge

Everyone makes a toasting fork at the outset. It enables me to teach different techniques and assess skills (many go on to make other items on the day). It is also something useful to take home and enjoy – ideal for your marshmallows over the bonfire or for poking a loved one into action!

Firstly, they create a round taper on a round bar using only the hammer and anvil (we keep to traditional methods for the whole course).

Next, they form the hoop (handle) and wrap the taper around the shaft of the fork.

Then they make the prongs at the other end, starting by taking the round material and making this into a rectangle.

They split this rectangular section down the middle to form individual prongs.

The prongs are then opened out and each is formed into a square taper, finally, they use the scrolling tongs to shape each prong.

Listing out the method like this sounds rather quick and easy, however, managing the forge, and learning to work with the hammer and anvil will take each person a few hours. Some spend all day working on their toasting fork, others are quicker and go on to make other items.  

It now takes me 15 mins to make a toasting fork, with just over 40 years of practice!

The rewards

Although I repeat this process with all my new attendees, it is always a pleasure to welcome each and every budding blacksmith to the forge and see them get stuck in.

Candle holder and toasting fork on the table (made by a budding blacksmith)
Items made by a previous attendee

It’s always interesting to meet people, work with different personalities and learn their stories. Each individual takes a different approach to the task and it’s always fascinating for me to watch this. I might learn from them too.

To take a complete novice (usually, this is not something they have done before), and see them make something with their very own hands is my reward each time. Many believe they will not be able to succeed. I’ve never had anyone fail yet.

I give people the space to find their way, I make observations of course, but most importantly I want them to be happy with what they are producing and proud to have used their own hands to have created something they can keep and treasure.

Everyone can be a blacksmith for a day! Hope to see you at the forge very soon. Jo

Scilly Times

Scilly Times

Imagine a place in the UK that takes longer to get to than most of your standard foreign holidays, costs more than travelling to somewhere sunny in Europe, and has many restrictions and difficulties due to its size and location.  

Yes, it’s the Scilly Isles. 

Not the main island of St Mary’s – that’s got roads, cars, shops, and restaurants! We are talking about one of the off islands. So remote, so beautiful and so worth the effort.

Here’s a little account of our recent Scilly Times.

The Journey

This is a UK holiday, how can it take longer than going abroad?

We live in the Southeast and we need to travel to Penzance in Cornwall to get the ferry over to St Marys.  That’s about a 5 – 6 hour drive, depending on the traffic (sometimes much longer).  

View from our overnight stay to St Michael’s Mount

The ferry, The Scillonian, leaves for St Mary’s around 9am and check-in is approx an hour beforehand. 

If you are camping, you need to deliver your camping equipment to the harbour about an hour before check-in, around 7am.

It’s not much fun travelling through the night, so we booked into Scilly Parking for an overnight stay. 

It’s still an early start, but so much better than being up all night!

The ferry takes approximately three hours to St Mary’s. Once there, all of your luggage is loaded onto the relevant off-island boat. Each boat comes alongside The Scillonian and they slide your luggage down a hatch and manually load up each boat.

Once this is completed, your off-island boat will head to the quay and pick up the foot passengers.

Next a 20- 30 min boat ride over to your chosen island.

Luggage is handed up the quay onto the waiting tractor and is transported to the campsite. The passengers walk!

Journey time: approx. 28 hours (with overnight stop and pub dinner en route!)

St Agnes

St Agnes is on the most south-westerly edge of the Isles of Scilly. It measures just a mile or so across, and its closest neighbour is Gugh. Gugh is joined by a sand bar at low tide. The island has about 85 residents, no proper roads and no cars (the odd car is sometimes used by a local for transportation, but there are not cars in the way we are used to on the mainland).  

There is one pub, one café, and one post office with stores as well as one gift shop. The campsite is housed on the farm and does have a small shop selling produce and some camping essentials.  

St Agnes is the only island on the Scillies not to have a hotel, although there are some self-catering options. Forget these in high season, as they are repeatedly booked by the same families year after year. If you are able to travel out of high season, you might get lucky.

If not, you will need to try your hand at camping!

The Campsite

Troytown Farm, home of St Agnes campsite, is the southernmost settlement in the United Kingdom! 

It is the most incredible setting with stunning views across to the island of Annet, the Western Rocks, and out to Bishop Rock and the Lighthouse. The view is constantly changing along with the tides. It’s very exposed – next stop USA – and the storms regularly blow in.  

View from our tent

The facilities are basic but good. Water is always in short supply, so there are timed tokens for the showers, and everyone is very conscious of water conservation. No electrical hookups are available, and a limited number of dogs are allowed.

The farm produces its own milk, yoghurt, meat and incredible ice cream – there is always an amazing choice of flavours on offer.

Night skies are truly amazing – you have never seen the stars like this before as there is no light pollution.

The Sunsets

Sunsets need their own special mention. They are truly incredible if the weather is kind, and you can see the magical event unfold. 

I think it best to let the pictures speak for themselves.

St Agnes sunsets

The swimming

I’m a keen wild swimmer. 

I much prefer a lake or the sea to a pool, so the swimming on St Agnes is especially good.  

You will often have a beach to yourself, or only be sharing with a couple of others. Crystal clear waters and bright white sand – you can forget you are in the UK and imagine you are on a Caribbean island! The water is fairly fresh, many swim in a wetsuit. Pick your time to swim as the tide turns and comes over the warm sand and it’s almost barmy (promise).

A Day on St Agnes

Pop to the campsite shop for some milk, eggs, yoghurt, top up your ice blocks and get the coffee on back at the tent.

4 pints of beer on a table with a view of the sea at The Turks Head, St Agnes

A slow start, a shower, and a walk around the island with the dog. The scenery, the terrain, the wildlife never fail to amaze each and every day. Usually, lunch back at the tent, or perhaps pop to the café for a crab roll as a treat.

Nip to the Post Office and pick up some food and wine for the evening (the supplies boat arrives around lunchtime so stocks are always better later in the day).

A read and relax and head off to the beach for a swim. A stop at the pub on the way back for a pint with a view. In fact, a pint with the best view ever!

Back to the campsite shop before it closes for some ice cubes and a cheeky gin and tonic while preparing dinner. Eat and watch the sun go down. Maybe light a fire on the beach and chat with some fellow campers.

Some days, you might be stuck in the tent for a while listening to the rain.

The competition

Chat to anyone you meet on St Agnes and they will ask you if you’ve been before.  

Many will tell you how many years they have been coming to the island. Most start enjoying holidays on St Agnes and fail to do anything else. 

It’s that sort of place.

What’s quite funny is the assumption that they have been coming longer than you! My hubby, who would never boast about such things, has been returning to St Agnes for 53 years and counting. We’ve had some years away, but recently returned after an 11-year gap. Too long, the magic starts seeping in as soon as you step off the boat onto the jetty…….

My other travel blogs include the Isle of Mull and eating/drinking our way around a little bit of Spain and Portugal.

As the summer draws to a close and you return to work after a break, maybe it’s time to start plotting the next adventure.

Too hot for choc?

Too hot for choc?

Heat is a bit of an issue with chocolate, here are some stories, ideas, and inspiration when it’s a bit too hot for choc:

chocolate heart in melting chocolate puddle

Melting Chocolate

The melting point for fat molecules in chocolate is about 36 degrees, which is very close to our body temperature of 37 degrees, hence the melting in the mouth experience.

There are lots of things you need to know to temper chocolate but allowing it to set at the right temperature is a must too. Ideally, you want to ensure that the room you are in never exceeds 20 degrees.

It’s been a little challenging lately tempering and setting chocolate in this heat. Here are some tips to help when chocolate becomes a bit of a disaster darling!

Spare a thought for the poor contestants in the Bake-Off tent – a hot tent with all those ovens on is just impossible!

What about the Workshops?

I have a lovely summerhouse where I host most of my chocolate workshops. At this time of year, I try and book my events in the morning as the building is much cooler then.

Summerhouse in the sunshine

A trusted portable air con machine is also on hand should the temperature start to get a little too high.

The temperature did defeat us when it reached the mid-to-high-30s and sadly, we had to postpone a couple of events. Even if we had got everything made and set, getting them home would have been a challenge. 

If you are attending any chocolate event, or off to buy some chocolate treats, remember a cool bag to bring them home in to avoid a puddle by the time you get in.

Chocolate in the Fridge

If you are working with chocolate and you want to pop your tempered chocolate in the fridge to help it set then pop it in for just five mins or so and it will not go dull.  

When you package up your creations you can then keep them in the fridge at this time of year (if you have a cool dark space, even better).  

For really posh chocolate, you might want to protect this in a container or ensure it’s well wrapped before popping it in your fridge.

For your everyday chocolate, fridge-cold is just how it’s enjoyed by many of you.

Crowdfunding saves Shop

Did you hear the one about the corner shop where all the chocolate melted?

A local shop in Scunthorpe lost £1,000 worth of chocolate as it melted in the recent heatwave. The shop owners have had such a difficult time in recent months and due to the high level of excess payment required didn’t feel they could claim on their insurance.  

The owners’ daughter appealed to the local community and set up a crowdfunding page, asking for small donations to help save the shop. The owner cried every time someone offered some support and a significant amount has been raised to help replace the chocolate stocks.

Now that’s a story to melt the heart.

I Scream for Ice Cream

We need to finish off with a little cooler, what better way to do this than enjoying our chocolate ice cream style?

whippy ice cream with chocolate flake starting to melt

Fancy making your own? 

This recipe from BBC Good Food has good ratings and they claim is easy to make.

Foodism magazine has done some great research for you – the best supermarket ice creams to buy.  

These range from trusted favourties to vegan, gluten-free, palm-oil-free, organic, and artisan options. The pics are enough to get you drooling.

Does the ice cream van still visit your area? Can you hear their tune calling you?  How about a 99, one way of stopping your flake from melting, stick it in your Mr. Whippy!

Stay cool, it’s never really too hot for choc.

It’s time to simplify

It’s time to simplify

I’ve been making some changes to how I intend to work going forward. This is my chance to say a huge thank you to those that have joined me on various projects and adventures along the way and how/where you can find me going forward!

Here’s why it’s time to simplify

Juggling too many balls means I drop them, or don’t give time and attention to my projects in the way that feels right.

Chocolate is my first love and I want time to focus on this more. Since I have been able to welcome people in person again, bookings have been brilliant.  

As well as this, I’ve been doing lots more schoolwork lately. Careers fairs, enrichment activities, and enterprise days. This is such rewarding work and something I’d like the chance to develop.

My business in a chocolate box opportunity has seen a revival. This is where I train someone to run a version of The Melting Pot (under their own banner). This is a much bigger commitment of my time, involving training and then ongoing support for the first months of trading. 

It’s totally exciting that people are wanting to create their own chocolate workshop businesses where they live!

If I create space and I have a clear focus on what I want the future to hold, it is more likely to be successful than holding on to everything in fear of letting things go.

What I’m saying goodbye to

New Dawn Business Start-up Training

Building Confidence Programme

Creating Magic Challenge

Thank you to everyone who took part in these, it was a privilege to see you start to fly with your new business ventures, boost your confidence to tackle obstacles, and see what magic you wanted to explore.

Facebook pages/groups/membership sites have been closed. If you need any information from me or have a question or query, please get in touch.

Newsletter – see below on where to find out more

Where you can find me

At the chocolate tanksbook a workshop, come along and have some fun on your own or with a group.

On my blog – I have decided not to continue with a newsletter and focus on my blog instead ‘From Chocolate with Love’. We cover all things chocolate of course, as well as business and lifestyle – anything from camping to relationships and more!

Please keep an eye on the website for offers or special events.

Supporting local mental health charity Tilehouse Counselling (for just a few hours each week). The work they do is very close to my heart and so vital in our community. A shameless plug – you can support them each week by buying a community lottery ticket.  50% of each ticket sold is donated to Tilehouse.

The future

To think I actually considered selling the chocolate side of my business a couple of years ago to focus on the other areas I was developing! Now I’m doing the opposite.  

This has come about from listening to myself, really tuning into what I enjoy the most, and going with what flows with ease.

Change is always a little nerve-racking and I sincerely hope that creating space to pursue a simplified and more chocolatey future is the right decision. I’m excited to find out! 

Only time will tell. 

Do please pop back here to find out more!

If you have any stories or tips for simplifying life, please come and share on my Facebook page.

7 Secrets to a Happy Marriage

7 Secrets to a Happy Marriage

Or 7 secrets to a happy relationship, married or not.

Dawn and Jo Fry at the church with the vicar on their wedding day


I wasn’t at all bothered about getting married, but my hubby really wanted to, so we did. Surprisingly, it made a difference. Nothing earth-shattering, but a subtle difference, a proper full-on commitment. I loved having a ‘hubby’ – not just the label of course! We celebrated 27 years together this June.


Honestly, Bridget Jones, this is not me trying to be a ‘smug married’!


7 secrets to a happy marriage are meant to be a bit of fun, as well as a nod to some of the serious sauce!

Luck

How do you meet the perfect partner? In our case, we had a dear friend do a bit of matchmaking. We had both been around the block a little, past experience definitely shaped decisions and for us, the timing was right.
Fundamentally there has to be a willingness for a relationship from both partners and a desire to make it work if possible.

Then add in a dollop of luck.

Pick a practical one

My hubby can turn his hand to literally anything practical. I may have had to develop a patient approach to some jobs as they can (and do) take years to complete. Knowing that something can be made, fixed or mended is such a comfort.
If you can’t find a practical one (and it’s not going to be you) then make sure you have contacts and funds to get someone in or it will drive you mad.

Play to your strengths

Divvy up the jobs depending on who is best at them. Hope that it’s a roughly fair split, if not a bit of negotiation may be required, or if possible, buy in some outside help perhaps.

Don’t hate me too much, but my hubby loves housework, especially vacuuming, and keeping the house nice and clean. I hate it, so that’s a huge win/win! Cooking is my thing, so I will usually do all the shopping and meal planning. Some jobs we share.

As a born organiser I run all household management and the admin for our businesses. Even persuaded hubby to take up teaching blacksmithing courses after the success of running chocolate ones! I find this easy, and hubby hates it! Social secretary and especially travel agent are my favourite roles.

You can’t change anyone. Don’t expect your partner to get good at something they don’t like or find difficult to do. The only thing you can change is you.

It’s good to talk

espresso coffee in blue cup with biscuit and sugar cubes

It’s so easy, especially if you have been together for a long time, have very young children, are coping with teenagers, busy jobs, and other commitments, to stop talking properly to each other. There is so often a presumption about what your partner is thinking or feeling, without actually talking to each other properly to find out.

We try and keep a day in the week where we do something together – it’s often just a dog walk, but it may be something more exciting now and again!

Make time to talk – whether that be a date night or something simple like going out for coffee or a walk.

Respect

Without respect surely any relationship is doomed. Mutual respect is a must, and if that is missing or lost – do all you can to try and find it again.

If you are not respecting yourself then start there. Maybe you need a change and it’s time to focus on doing something different, sparking yourself back to life?

Shared Dreams

No two people can be on the same page all the time. Marriage is a compromise, but we can’t only live someone else’s dream. What are yours?

Then you can work on what you both want. What does the future hold (if we are lucky enough to have one)? It can be exciting, having a shared dream focuses your intentions as it’s something to work towards. Nothing is set in stone either, so you have a chance to change/enhance and improve any plans you make.

Book that date night, get talking and discuss your shared visions and dreams for the future.

The Duvet

Get your own. Seriously, we each have our own duvet and it’s perfect. Two single duvets on our double bed. No one loses the covers and gets cold. Choose a different tog that suits (I’m always too hot, hubby too cold).

Finished with my absolute top tip for marital bliss – a good night’s sleep with your own duvet!

Foodies on Tour

Foodies on Tour

The perfect recipe:

Douro by the Douro
  • One special friend
  • Joint obsession with all things food and drink-related
  • Milestone big birthday
  • Mission to have some fun

What better way to celebrate than head off as a couple of Foodies on Tour!

Trust the Process

My friend is a bit of an intrepid traveller and loves nothing more than trekking up mountains in far-flung places. As exciting as that sounds, I’m usually a bit less adventurous. This was her special trip, and I was rather anxious to hear what would make the shortlist.

I decided that whatever she really wanted to do I was going to say yes and embrace it.  

She said because it was us, it had to be about the food, and she decided on Spain and Portugal. My perfect option. Trust that process folks and look what happens.

The Itinerary

Fly to Bilbao – because the Guggenheim was on the bucket list (one-night stay in a hotel)

Head to San Sebastian (two-night stay in a hotel)

Back to Bilbao to catch a flight to Porto (three-night stay in a hostel)

Bus from Porto to Lisbon (three-night stay in an apartment)

Fly home

Bilbao

If you ever find yourself in Bilbao, if only for a quick stopover – factor in a trip to the Guggenheim

Oh, my word what a breath-taking place. 

As this is about the food of our trip – watch this space for more on the Guggenheim soon!

We only had time for one evening meal – so on the recommendation of our hotel owner, we headed to Café Iruna (follow the link to see the amazing décor). As we were a little later, there was not such a huge selection of pinchos (bite-sized tasty morsels served in all the bars) so we ordered off the menu. A fresh tuna salad and some amazing croquettes were very tasty. Not sure what we drank that night, it was white, cold, refreshingly crisp and so reasonably priced.

San Sebastian

What a beauty. Well worth a visit if you have not yet experienced the delights of this wonderful place. With sea, sand, bars, beaches, and such a wonderful selection of places to eat and drink you can’t fail to love it!

We started in a bar called Cote in the Old Town with a fab G & T. There was a decent gin menu on offer and the barman really took care zesting fruit and adding rose petals to give a wonderful fresh taste.

Again, on the recommendation of our hotel/guide books, we headed for pinchos/drinks at various different bars. Quite an experience, very buzzy and busy and a little tricky to eat at times. 

Delicious tasty morsels but sometimes a little too mad for us if we are very honest. We ended the evening at the must-have cheesecake place La Vina – Tarta de queso (Basque burnt cheesecake). It really was an experience not to be missed.

After some sightseeing the next day, we ended up at a wonderful seafood restaurant by the harbour and enjoyed a long lazy seafood lunch with a lovely bottle of vinho verde. That evening was spent at a couple of quieter establishments, with more pinchos and wine. Perfect

Porto

If I could recommend anything, start your trip in Porto with a food tour. We opted for the vintage food tour with Taste Porto, which as well as covering lots of wonderful food and drink, also covered lots of fascinating history too. Our guide Miguel was brilliant and extremely knowledgeable.

A food tour gives you the low down on all the fabulous foodie secrets of the city, usually shared by a local with all that insider knowledge.

We enjoyed meals by the Duoro (with wine to match of course), little hidden bars and small plates, a picnic with food from the market (I ate a fig that will never be forgotten it was that good!), and the best Pastel de Nata EVER. Made on the premises with artisan coffee you must go to Manteigaria – Fábrica de Pastéis de Nata just WOW.

Tinned sardines, fish pate, wonderful soap, and good chocolate also filled our bags to bring away!

Lisbon

Last but certainly not least was Lisbon.  

It was extremely busy while we were there, and you need to do your research on where to eat. There was a constant vying for your custom, and we found this a little tedious at times. We had a couple of slightly disappointing experiences, but this was more than made up for the two best experiences of the whole holiday food-wise!

Dinner at Ofício Lisboa was I think, the best meal of the holiday. I’ll let the pictures do the talking.

Curried spider crab
Chocolate tart (of course) with a goats cheese/caramel foam!

On our penultimate day, we took the train out to Cascais and had a wonderful walk and lunch by the ocean. 

We started with giant grilled prawns, followed by sardines, and finished with some local almond tart. Highly recommend a trip there, escaping the crowds and enjoying good food with a wonderful backdrop!

Now how to top that? 

I’m already planning what might be on my big birthday foodie trip!

To trust or not to trust?

To trust or not to trust?

You’ve started your business and you are so excited and want to share your wonderful concept with the world.

two rocks posing as people holding hands

Immediately the fears creep in.  What if someone else thinks it’s a good idea and tries to steal it.

When is it right to trust or not to trust that instinct?

The wrong tone

That spirit of fear, or distrust, is now contaminating your copy.

You temper your tone and are careful who you mention, keeping the attention firmly on yourself and not crediting anyone else.

Perhaps you are a bit cagey about exactly what’s on offer – you don’t wish to give too many secrets away. 

The right energy

There is an art to gaining attention and drip-feeding content for momentum and a big reveal.  Done with fear your energy will be off.

Trust in yourself and your product or service and be open to sharing.

Ask yourself, what is that fear really about?

It is doubt about whether you are good enough? Do you have a fear about someone else being better than you?  Are you feeling the dreaded imposter syndrome?

Recognise this for what it really is.  Take some time before you write, post, call and share your news to get in the right positive energy.

Get over yourself

Usually your business concept will be done by someone already – there is very rarely a completely unique idea. 

Do some market research.  Who is the competition and what are they offering?  Don’t go down that rabbit hole of not being as good as them.  Remember, you are the unique element of what you offer as nobody can do you. Get over yourself and own that talent that got you here in the first place!

Competition can be a good thing.  Coffee anyone?  How many artisan coffee shops are in your local town?  Which ones do you visit?  The one or two that resonate with you, that have the friendly barista or your favourite cake?  So everyone comes to your town for great coffee – not everyone chooses the same coffee shop. People will choose you, the others are not the enemy.

What are you missing?

Could you collaborate with another outfit that is similar to yours?  Do you offer an element that they don’t and visa versa, meaning you can offer a bigger or better package to your clients?

What about the possibility of sending work to each other when you are too busy?  Have a grown-up conversation at the outset about the arrangement and keep a note of what happens.  If you are willing and open to try it may work out really well for both parties.  If not, you can politely withdraw from the arrangement at any time.

Act with fear and shut others out and you may damage your reputation in the community.

You can get burnt

There is always a risk in working with others – but that attitude of mistrusting everyone will not serve you well in business.

Work out the upside and the potential downside.   

Go back to your strategy.  Can this relationship/arrangement help you achieve your goals?

Obviously we have all had a bad experience, one that we wish we had not allowed to happen, but you will learn so much more from the odd mistake.

With experience you become more confident about your decision-making process and know when it’s right to trust or not to trust that opportunity or person. 

Are you ready to start your own business (with or without chocolate) and feel that fear but do it anyway – trust yourself and put your faith and trust in the good ones out there. Good luck.

100 Ways to Unwind!

100 Ways to Unwind!

A list of 100 ways to unwind – because it’s all about YOU

A landscape at dusk
  1. Breathe – sit quietly, notice your breath in and out, breathe deeply
  2. Walk barefoot on the grass
  3. Sign up for a yoga class
  4. Have a PJ day
  5. Light a smelly candle and let the smell calm your senses
  6. Take a long, hot soak in the bath
  7. Meditate – as little as 5 mins a day can be beneficial, set a timer, get quiet and let thoughts flow, you can download guided meditations if that is helpful for you
  8. Visit the woods – hear the rustle of the leaves, the snap of a twig, notice the light filtering through the canopy, the majesty and strength of the trees
  9. Start the day with some yoga poses (use youtube to find out how to do them properly)
  10. Visit the sea, listen to the sound of the waves
  11. Watch the sunrise, notice the potential in a new day
  12. Watch the sunset, notice the beauty at the end of the day, and be thankful for at least one good thing in your life right now
  13. Celebrate a full moon, stand and wonder at the bright moon in a vast sky
  14. Sign up for a Pilates class
  15. Take a walk in nature – notice your surroundings, the sounds, the fields, the trees, the sunshine, the rain, the sky, the clouds
  16. Read a book
  17. Journal your feelings – find a lovely notebook and write regularly
  18. Go for a swim
  19. Visit the mountains, take in the view
  20. Drink lots of water
  21. Enjoy some peace and quiet and some alone time
  22. Go for a jog or run – studies have recently shown and even a short run each week is beneficial
  23. Sit by the bank of a river and watch the water flow, imagine your worries flowing by
  24. Get baking or cooking and notice the lovely smells permeating the home
  25. Have a cuppa
  26. Talk to a good friend
  27. Visit a museum
  28. Buy a colouring book and some decent pens – do some colouring
  29. Watch your diet, enjoy eating healthy foods and avoid too many sugary snacks
  30. Can you break down what you are worried about?  Set aside sometime each day to worry – instead of allowing worries to undermine you all the time, say to yourself, you will worry about that at ‘worry time’ and sit and think about all those things that are worrying you in detail.  Some you may be able to fix, some you will not.  Acknowledge each thing you are worried about and then move on until the next worry time.
  31. Go to a fitness class
  32. Stick on your favourite tune and dance around the kitchen
  33. Watch something easy and light on TV
  34. Listen to your favourite podcast
  35. Read/watch or listen to someone inspirational – Ted Talks have lots of wonderful options to choose from
  36. Book yourself a massage or other beauty/relaxation treatment
  37. Eat a little dark chocolate
  38. Declutter a cupboard, a room, or a space such as your desk
  39. Do a crossword/quiz or sudoku
  40. Have a laugh; listen to comedy, joke around with friends, watch a comedy show
  41. Draw or paint something
  42. Do your favourite sporting activity
  43. Take up a new sporting activity
  44. Spend time with animals – visit the zoo or a farm
  45. Take the dog for a walk or spend time with your pet(s), join in with a friend on a dog walk if you don’t have a dog yourself
  46. Play an instrument
  47. Hug a tree
  48. Watch children playing
  49. Do some retail therapy – maybe just some window shopping will be enough
  50. Create time in the day to think or daydream
  51. Go for a cycle ride or a spin class
  52. Go fishing or sit watching someone else fishing
  53. Climb a hill (or mountain) and enjoy the view from the top
  54. Visit an art gallery
  55. Watch a film at the cinema
  56. Go to the ballet/theatre
  57. Buy yourself some flowers
  58. Work in the garden, allotment or help someone else with their garden/allotment (even a planter or window box will suffice)
  59. Be grateful for what you have
  60. Try essential oils and aromatherapy
  61. Visit a comedy club
  62. Go to a festival/music gig
  63. Think about your next holiday, do some research and book something to look forward to
  64. Get organised, make action plans and lists and tick things off as you go
  65. Visit a coffee shop, buy your favourite drink and sit and watch the world go by
  66. Knit or crochet
  67. Learn to play a new instrument
  68. Do something mindless – some housework, clean the car, organise a drawer
  69. Smell the roses – notice the aroma from your favourite blooms
  70. Write something – a blog or some fiction
  71. Buy yourself a little treat
  72. Take a power nap
  73. Look at some inspiring photos
  74. Visit a spa
  75. Organise your emails and sort your inbox
  76. Write a letter to a loved one
  77. Visit a church or cathedral and wonder at the amazing architecture and history
  78. Visit a beautiful garden
  79. Get an early night
  80. Visit the library
  81. Take up a new hobby/learn a new skill
  82. Get up earlier and finish your ‘jobs/tasks’ earlier to create more free time
  83. Visit a food market and marvel at the delicious wares on sale
  84. Enjoy the sunshine on your face
  85. Change your bedding and notice the lovely smell of fresh sheets
  86. Skim stones across the water
  87. Visit a beautiful lake and marvel and the view
  88. Have a lie in or a duvet day
  89. Go and watch your team play a sport
  90. Plant a tree
  91. Talk to someone – a problem is better shared
  92. Ask for help, delegate something, you don’t have to own everything
  93. Remind yourself that perfection is overrated – good is good enough
  94. Put on a facemask, or an eye mask
  95. Watch a tearjerker film and have a good cry
  96. Ask for a hug
  97. Support someone in need
  98. Light some incense. Scents like Sandalwood and Sage can help calm anxieties and aid relaxation.
  99. Avoid negativity – don’t judge others but try and separate your identity and emotions from it.
  100. BE YOU!